Sunday, January 8, 2012

The Beginning of a New Book

Welcome to the beginning of a brand new book, that's what I am calling 2012. I would like to tell you that I am sad to see 2011 leave, but I am not, I was eager to close that book. Though I don't like to openly complain, the last 2 years were like a bad story and I am not sad to see them go. Life has not been easy, and I am sure many people have had that same thought. I am sure it could have been worse, but there sure was room for improvement, lots of it.

I must say that I failed at most of my attempts to do anything I had planned to do, blogging was one of them. Painting and growing my business was another failed attempt. I can't pin a specific reason to it, health and lack of enthusiasm, depression and just plain lack of time, or maybe organization, were some of the things. So of course, I am saying I failed, because I did. I am starting off the year on a down note as I kick my own butt.
I found myself rather sad over the holidays, wishing for the old days and missing so many people that I have lost over the last few years. I watched my grand kids playing on Christmas Eve and thought of my deceased husband and how he never saw the girls grow up or even began to see a grandchild. I thought of my husband's brother and Mom who just left us within the last 2 years, my Mom who loved the kids and always made me mad, and my dear uncle, who was my mentor and my favorite person. January is always bad for me as it is the anniversary of my husband's death.

I have had time to think and reflect, I have many decisions to make and wondering if I can make this year better, if I can find a good doctor, if I can feel well enough to do what I need to do, if even I can get the ambition, there is no more time to play, I have to start doing and really, not sure that I know how. I don't make resolutions, I make vague goals, sometimes they are accomplished and sometimes not. This year, they have to be.
Christmas was nice, but not the same. However, we did have a huge tree that was way too big for the house, LOL. Decorated it was beautiful, but so in the way. My daughter insisted on this tree, thank you Mandy, but next year, it will have to be a bit smaller. No star was going on that tree.
We had lots of food, fun times and memories. I can't complain.
I did mange to do my craft show, it was rough and there sure wasn't enough, but I can call it successful as I sold most of what I had, just kicking my own butt for not being ready with a year to do so.


We also obtained a new furry member to the household, a beautiful little girl named Muffin, she has been a true joy to have around, we do believe that she may be a Maine Coon, she gets furrier by the day and has had her first illness at 5 months. She somehow got a virus and was down and out for a few days, but she sure has bounced back.
So I can't say the whole year was a waste. There were good points.



So as we progress into this new book, let's hope that we can all turn the page to a fantastic, successful New Year, with each page getting better and better until we reach the end and close it and say "It was the best year ever!" There are sure no guarantees, ever, all we can do is what we can do, but I know I can do better. So for now, here's wishing you Warm Winter Blessings, and lots of good stories along the way. We are here for each other, that helps makes things go a little better even when things aren't so bright!
Happy New Year!

8 comments:

  1. Eileen don't be so hard on yourself.....for not accomplishing your goals no matter how vague they may seem. Its hard to keep trudging on when there are major health issues that are unresolved....that can be both frustrating and depressing when you just simply don't feel good. I have been dealing with some pretty difficult back issues the past year and also some very, very emotional personal issues. It can be so hard to just get out of bed each day and put one foot in front of the other.....let alone accomplish MAJOR goals.... I am TRYING not to be so hard on myself, cut my self some slack and try to find some small joy in each new day. I pray that 2012 will bring you health, peace and happiness.
    Hugs,
    Lynn

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lynn, as always, you are too kind, but I don't mind. Thanks you and I try not to be too hard on myself, but I constantly have "someo" on my back about everything I should have done and could have done, I think that just doesn't help at all. I am having trouble with my back and legs, makes it very hard to walk, can't get answers, just anti depressants, eye problems that keep me from painting, I understand how hard it really can be. I keep pushing, sometimes I don't feel, hard enough. I have always been my worst critic, one of my bad points. Hugs and thank you, I am happy to have you around, you help more than you know!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Morning Eileen, gotta agree with Lynn here too.. it's not doing us any good to be so hard on ourselves.. this hasn't been a great year for me either and am trying to look at what I did accomplish instead of what I didn't..never make resolutions here either.. my goal is to paint one day a week..even if it's only for an hour but starting this week...I felt the same way about the fall season..finally did a blog post too.. after being away since sept..lol time just moves too fast I think... will add you to my blog list.. miss so many things on FB now..Take care of yourself.. ignore that negative "someone" and here's to a better year for all of us...
    Kath
    xx

    ReplyDelete
  4. Kath, thank you, I am trying real hard to ignore that person, but it's very hard, should be my biggest supporter but is real quick to let me know that I have done nothing right and maybe it's time to get a job, ignoring my physical issues. But hey, I have you all and I find that helps me so much more than what I have right here. I hope that you have a fantastic year, that we both do, that we all do, we need it. Hugs!

    ReplyDelete
  5. What a year it was..good and sad memories...But a New Year is a time to change the negative into the positive..RIGHT?..2012 will bring you and all of us better things...hugs <3

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yes Jane, a new year, a new book, last year was a very down year, I am hoping this one can be much brighter for us all. Hugs!

    ReplyDelete
  7. This year will be epic! We ALL need a good year and it is good friends - like you - that make that happen!! ~KM

    ReplyDelete
  8. Max, what can I say, I luv ya. Thank you and I am hoping the same. Hugs!

    ReplyDelete

I love to hear your comments and suggestions, thanks for sharing with me.